121. Notes - on spiritual memory and the AN-EL

121. 14 May 2019

       Noon, local time. Carol is walking, you are enjoying the late Spring at Shale Hollow Park across from Kroger's on the Rt. 23. You just spent time talking to the Park Ranger, telling him how wonderful this little park is; always pristine and in a beautifully wooded Ohio hills setting. - Amorella

       1223 hours. The woods are just luscious this time of year, reminds me of sections of Auntie and Uncle Doc's old hundred and so acre farm up on Freeman Road north of Westerville in the 1940's and early 50's . . . long ago. 

       You are in a spiritual memory, Mr. Orndorff. - mh

       1230 hours. I didn't realize there was such a thing as spiritual memory. 

       Spiritual memories are those embedded in your soul. 

       You ran some errands and stopped at Smashburger's for lunch and Graeter's for ice cream. Carol is presently in Macy's and after you are heading to nearby Hoover Dam and a garden store out on Sunbury Road. - Amorella

       1402 hours. This is interesting. What is the criteria for a spiritual memory, Miss Havisham?

       The heartanmind agree. The single memory then goes deep in the heart and mind and rests dormant; a flowered memory, blooming only when observed. mh

       1441 hours. What is the criteria for various depths of heartanmind in this context?

       First, think of a spiritual heartanmind in terms of circular, ball-like atmosphere without a centered earth. Use colors for selected levels. The mind-intellect blows cool to cold, the heart-emotion blows warm to hot. Consciousness and circumstance is the weathered moisture. Without stretching the analogy too far, the soul shell is weathered from within while the Earth is weathered from without. 

       You are home from a relaxing ride out County Line Road to Sunbury Road, then up Sunbury Road to Galena and back along the Old Three C's Highway to Big Walnut Road to Africa Road to home. - Amorella

       1600 hours. If I am understanding Miss Havisham correctly the 'levels' of the heartanmind are as air pressures.

       No, Mr. Orndorff. The levels are the strains of continuity (self-honesty and self-dignity) that allow for self-acceptance and spiritual growth within the weathery mix of consciousness within its circumstance. Your spiritual circumstance after life is nakedly observed by me, Miss Havisham. I therefore become your dressing by which other souls view you. I am your protector and defender. I am your armor and your sword. Only the AN-EL can penetrate a soul in this book. mh

       Moving onto bedtime. Today's blog broadens your scope on the soul and its dealings with the heartanmind as well as with an AN-EL and with other souls. How do you respond? - Amorella

       2213 hours. I am surprised and interested in developing questions to give me further insight into my own soul, Miss Havisham. I need to think this out was we move along. I appreciate there is 'reason' used throughout.I appreciate that the spiritual world has a sense of order that can be understood (in a limited way of course) through analogy. For example, it is intriguing to me that the soul moves toward the AN-EL [ANN-ELL]. The AN-EL does not appear to move from the soul's perspective. This appears to be, perhaps, a very specific metaphysical 'Rule'.I am curious about all this but most I would like to focus on the "Rules of the Nature of the Spiritual World" within my soul, Miss Havisham's, said circumstances. (2227)

       To know thyself is an important factor in being human, to understand thyself within the heartansoulanmind, the human spirit, is bettering the understanding of one's self. This is a specific Rule within the "Rules of the Nature of the Human Spiritual World" within this book. Post, unless you have a further comment.- Amorella

       2234 hours. Thank you, Amorella, and thank you also, Miss Havisham.

120. Notes - Miss Havisham's perspective of AN-ELs

120. 13 May 2019

       Evening. So, we begin with yesterday's unexpected question in unconscious rebuttal to Miss Havisham's "I am your soul". - Amorella

       2213 hours. And, I immediately thought: "If you don't have wings [Miss Havisham], do Angels?" Speaking of Angels -- I have an observation. When conversing with an Angelic form I realize She or He (personified) knows the unconsciousness and thus knows what the person is going to think and/or say before the person does consciously. One cannot deceive an Angelic form in a one on one situation. With an Angel present one cannot deceive herself or himself. This is what I understand/perceive about Angels. This observation also appears to be true when heartanmind confront one's soul. (2226)

       Angels or the personified forms humans call Angels do not have wings. Angels, as I know them, have nothing but they nevertheless exist. I am not a soul unless I have charge of a human-like heartanmind, thus in the invisibility of spiritual nature, I have something, Angels, on the other hand, so to speak, have nothing. - mh

       2235 hours. What then of your poetic passage of Note 117:

**

    This Silence stretches from your living embodiment of earthanairanfireanwater to the AN-EL and back again in a Reality Beyond Reality. mh

**

       This is my exclamation of the above passage. Your spirit, your heartansoulanmind, moves toward the AN-EL. The AN-EL does not move. The physical body (biochemistry/physics) understands, in the moment, that what is perceived as physically nonreal is spiritually real. This is a Reality not a spiritual reality based on human faith. Human beings, in reality, need faith in themselves to exist in a higher sense of human consciousness. An AN-EL exists entirely separate from human thought and activity. To put it another way, think as an AN-EL and assume the physical world/universe does not exist. Only the soul carrying a heartanmind shows evidence of such an existence on/in a spiritual plane. Anything beyond a soul carrying a heartanmind is not noted. It does not exist to an AN-EL. mh

       2258 hours. This makes sense to me. Interesting. I never thought of an Angel not knowing or needing to know anything about the human spirit beyond a soul carrying a heartanmind that once perceivably 'lived physically'. I accept the reasoning as a plausibility. . .

       . . . just as an AN-EL might perceive 'human consciousness' a reality of memories and experiences, some imagined and some real, but both reacted upon with self-honesty and dignity. (2308)

       You may continue along this pathway until it is no longer spiritually relevant. Post. - Amorella

119. Notes - time to go

119. 12 May 2019

       Mid-afternoon. You and Carol are stopping by Cathy and Tod's to check out her flower gardens then you four are out to Sunday dinner. - Amorella

       I will now explain my poetic passage from Note 117 in more detail. mh

**

    This Silence stretches from your living embodiment of earthanairanfireanwater to the AN-EL and back again in a Reality Beyond Reality. mh

**

       1442 hours. I am suddenly anxious about your explanation. I cannot help but remember the ancient story of Icarus. 

       I am your soul, not your father. I have no wings and neither do you. -- You cannot unthink your first thought that comes to mind, 'If you don't have wings [Miss Havisham], do Angels?' mh

       Time to go to your sister's. Post. - Amorella

118. Notes - deeper?

118. 11 May 2019

       Saturday morning. You are facing east, sitting in the shade of Heritage Park in Westerville while Carol is walking this brisk, partly cloudy Spring day. - Amorella

       1057 hours. I did sleep well. We are heading for doughnuts at Schneider's Uptown when Carol returns. I really don't know what to say. There is nothing I can say about last night's 'lifting of the most private dilemma'. This was mentioned a couple of times in encountersinmind@blogspot.com, but somehow the circumstances were different; i.e. I wasn't struck head-on with it, and Miss Havisham's (my soul's comment); was an immediate 'self-induced' deeper and wordless reflection of my conscious reactiont. I don't know what 'deeper' means in this context. (1108)

       Carol is in a shopping mode -- cushions for outside chairs and also flowers for front porch pots. You are presently waiting in the lot outside At Home in Polaris area, a store sister Cathy suggested. - Amorella

       1227 hours. I will help mow and do the yard trimming later today. I am beginning to enjoy the outdoor work again now that my 'greased' knees are feeling somewhat better. Life is good for me going on to seventy-seven. 

       I will explain my previous comment of yesterday. mh

       The day fell away unto to night. Tomorrow, Miss H. 'continues. Post. - Amorella

       2219 hours. We had a busy work-in-the-yard afternoon and a relaxing do-nothing evening. 

117. Note - a crux unknowable to self

117. 10 May 2019

       Evening. You are at Just Hoops off Rt. 23 across from Five Guys waiting for the boys who have an hour to play basketball. Earlier today, Carol bought her 2019 Toyota Avalon Hybrid Limited with all the safety features and at a considerable savings. The exterior is Parisian Night Blue with a beige leather interior. Carol is pleased as are you and "Deal Makers: Lori and Paul"; a win-win for everyone involved. The car will be delivered within ten days. Carol is presently reading page 31, Chapter Four, of Harlan Coben's Darkest Fear. - Amorella

       1947 hours. An eventful day. Carol and I arrived home after a celebratory lunch in Westerville and almost immediately took hour naps. The negotiating is very tiring even though we were mostly observers. Our sales lady, Lori was excellent and so was Paul. They both worked to get Carol the best car at the best deal with the best trade-in price on her 2013 Avalon Hybrid Limited which at the time also negotiated (via online) for by Paul and salesman Larry at Joseph Toyota). Paul and Lori spent about an hour and a half to two hours on the negotiating this morning. Both were very polite throughout; fascinating to watch them bargaining. 

       You are at Kim and Paul's, the boys are showering and readying for bed. A slight pinkish orange glow straggles between the low hanging clouds this quickly cooling night. - Amorella

       2045 hours. You are sounding a bit like Miss Havisham, Amorella. Intuition tells me you are she playing tricks. Is this possible? I am presently reminded of my youth at four to seven years when I made up dialogue between cartoon characters of my own making to while away the time. Sometimes the stick-like characters would tell each other simple jokes. I enjoyed listening in. I was a self-entertaining machine early on. Mostly I liked the peace and quiet to allow these events to happen pretty much on their own. This is the way I remember it presently. Besides, the poetic description of the sunset above appears more soul brought and Amorella brought. (2053)

       You wonder if this is an astute memory or an invention-in-the-moment. - mh

       2058 hours. The 'wonderment' as you call it, Miss H., is the crux of my very private inner life. I cannot always tell the difference (such as now). I wouldn't stake my life on it either way. This is where I favor Socrates best: "Know Thyself". The dark humor is that as a human being this is not fully possible to know one's self. And, with that thought uprooted, I find the context enlivens itself when then thinking about one's physical death -- and an Angel of G-D or G-D pops up from one's liberated spirit, one's heartansoulanmind, and says, "And now, who are you?" in a polite and well-informed Voice. (2110)

       And, boy, this question is the crux of your very existence, is it not? - Amorella

       2112 hours. You have just nailed me to the stake, Amorella. This is the very crux of my existence because, as it were, this is a very real remembered spiritual experience that changed my perception of what reality is. The experience still exists as I perceived it within my heartansoulanmind. Wow-to-a-humbled-inner-silence. - rho

       Post. - Amorella

       This Silence stretches from your living embodiment of earthanairanfireanwater to the AN-EL and back again in a Reality Beyond Reality. mh

       2123 hours. To deny this in the most intimate of self-privacy would be a blasphemy even though I can never show and do not wish to be shown this is a reality. This also would be a blasphemy. I, my innermost self, walks on a tightrope that does not exist. This is my most quiet inner tale. This is how I am who I am for who knows why. - rho (2132)

116. Notes - to Cinci / Carol

116. 9 May 2019

       Moving on mid-morning. You are readying for the trip to Cincinnati. Once you drop Carol off (Ann isn't going to lunch today) you will take the car to P&G Auto Wash for a light wash with a good detailing. On the way home, you are planning on stopping at Toyota Direct off Morse Road to put the deposit on the car. - Amorella

       0833 hours. I have to miss lunch with Bud C. today because of the car wash. I'll see Bud next month if the girls have their lunch,

       You are at Pro Clean Car Wash & Detail on Arbor Square Drive across from P&G getting a Wash and a Super Interior Clean for $52.43 tax included at Paul's suggestion and you hope it is worth it. - Amorella

       1205 hours. I haven't had a car done here for a couple of years and never know how much to tip. They have a cafe in the place now, Joseph's Cup as well as upscale 'trinkets' sell. I'm a bit out of my league coming here but if it helps the trade in then all is well and good. I struggle between leaving eight or ten dollars for the tip. Pulled out a ten and dropped it to eight. We are very frugal people though it probably doesn't look it with a new house and within eight months a new car on top of it. I get the jitters thinking about it and a slightly upset stomach. We rarely spend money like this, actually, never. 

       Two school teachers who start with next to nothing; however you both had no school debt; then in a few years graduate school, again with no debt. Then, debt on two cars and a first house, then debt until paying for Kim's undergraduate and helping on her graduate school so she has no debt. Not until the year after your retirement in 2004 did you have no debts, and you still do not. This is the way it was and is. Frugal living. It was a necessity for you both to live this way. Now it is not, but for the most part after the car you will return to frugal living because you don't know any better. That's how I see it. - mh

       1220 hours. Wow. That pretty much summarizes our economic lifetime together. Carol is responsible for this state of our condition. I am ever thankful I married such a beautiful and wonderful woman. We have had a good life. 

       Post. - Amorella

115. Notes - on the day / dreams

115. 8 May 2019

       Mid-morning. You are in the parking lot at the boys' school waiting on Carol who is watching Owen perform at the piano. You listened to him practice yesterday and were not surprised to find him quite talented as he picked up the music at school and found he could play the tune without much trouble. Adults watching have to stand or sit on very small chairs, thus Kim told you to wait as his whole music class is performing individually thus it will take some time. - Amorella

       1005 hours. I gave him a healthy round of applause yesterday. Owen has his own talents as does Brennan. It is interesting watching the two develop in their own areas of interest as well as common ones. Both presently like jujitsu, football, basketball, soccer and golf as well as math, science and reading. Next year Owen will be in the fourth grade and Brennan in the second. I hope they continue to enjoy school. They have a variety of activities, as did Kim growing up. 

       Tomorrow you are to Cincinnati. Carol will meet Ann, Maria and Judy for lunch. You have yet to check with Bud. Earlier you told him you couldn't meet tomorrow because you were going to check out the Toyota dealer nearby while the girls were eating. Now, it's back in Paul's lap as you have a car the dealers will work toward selling you. It is a dark, blue exterior Avalon Limited Hybrid with a beige interior. The car will be built in Kentucky around the twenty-second of this month. It is similar in color only darker outside to the 2013 model you have; the interior leather is close to identical to what you have. - Amorella

       1034 hours. We will just be glad when the buying part is over. Finding the right car for us took a lot of emotional and intellectual energy. We love the Toyota Avalon though, it is fun to drive (for us) and we have never had a car more comfortable to ride in -- short or long trips. The safety features are amazing on the new one and we signed up for the most advanced of such features that the model has. It may be the last car we ever own. If the Avalon Hybrid ever comes up with a fully autonomous model while we are still alive and kicking we'll probably trade in this model for a new one, otherwise, this will be it; at least this is our thinking presently. (No more on the car, I'm tired of talking about it.)

       As you wish, my young man. Post. - Amorella

       This is not really a wish, Mr. Orndorff. You would rather get back to more esoteric thoughts and wonders. Buying and selling presents a harshness; a reality that has little to do with the dreams of a better more humane world in which people could raise their children. To you this has little to do with living in the present one.  mh

       1048 hours. I am not a Utopian thinker. 

       No. You are not. - Amorella

       You are home. Kim will send you and Paul the film of the performances today and you do want to see them. -- A thought flashed a minute or so ago and it has disorganized itself, i.e. gone to fog. - Amorella

       1147 hours. It had something to do with asking my soul to put together a more humane world in my head. Selections of such a world were in the alien Marsupial worlds of the Merlyn books. I already had some concepts that were not Utopian in my mind. I put those concepts in a fiction because I am not too much on how the world should be. I cannot really articulate these things well. The main concept is making a world, or a small part of the world a better place to raise children in a republic of sorts where most everyone can practice being humane in their everyday working and private lives. This even reads as Utopian. Such is the world and we people in it. 

       Back to your basics. Back to your esoteric and philosophical thoughts of decades ago. It is a waste of time and energy, boy. - Amorella

       1237 hours. You are right, Amorella. I have no one else to turn to but you and Miss Havisham. 

       She is less alien to your nature than I am. Talk to your soul as you will. Perhaps she can help you more than I am able to. - Amorella

       1242 hours. You are more angelic-like. I don't want you to go away. I need your stability and your consistency -- your perspective and point of view to help keep me on a humane path.

       I'm not leaving you, young man. I will not desert you. I leave you to talk to your soul more about who you and what a good goal or personal philosophy on what you would like to be while you are alive and fully conscious. - Amorella

       1247 hours. I am tired about thinking about myself all the time, I'd rather be thinking on the worlds of children and how to make things better for them. The world needs a better way to grow up and live humanely. I can contribute my heartanmind to such thinking. I mean, this is what I do -- think what I can, but that's all. I could write of dreams if I had any. 

       
      Post. - Amorella