141. Notes - like beginning again / humor levels

141. 5 June 2019

       Mid-afternoon. Carol is in Kroger's at north end Westerville. You were going to walk but it looks like rain. - Amorella

       1551 hours. Yesterday fielded a different slant on the blog page. You and Miss Havisham were having a conversation while I listened in. I wouldn't know if it were normal or not, but I haven't been caught up in it before. I'm smiling because it was rather funny to observe, and more importantly, I learned something. Souls, by definition can allow accidents to happen by overprotecting a heartanmind. Is this correct (at least in here).

       For your benefit; this is for your inquiring mind orndorff. We are creating a metaphysical system between your heartanmind and your soul. This is theoretical, if you will, not fact. In context, assume this is all theoretical metaphysics, shortrange, if you will. - Amorella

       1601 hours. Shortrange Metaphysics, I like that. Good title. Readers may think it strange that such conversations can take place in my head. Truth is, as a fiction writer, conversations between characters happen all the time. I even allow them to carry on like I'm not here. I've mentioned this in my blogs over the years. I find it amusing that they can do this but if you are going to give your characters free will you can't take it away whoever she or he may be. 

.

       I have never thought of myself as a personification in context; that is, before this blog experience. mh

       1638 hours. When writing fiction most everything observed about human beings is open to be shifted around, disguised and used. I use myself, parts of friends and acquaintances in smaller parts of my characters. I mention this in the Forward sections of the hardbound Merlyn books. I tried to make my Merlyn books plausible; and in my blogs, I attempted to show plausibility throughout. In the short and long run though, it is always fiction. This encountersinspirit blog is theoretical and metaphysical, but still fiction. And, I'm still an agnostic at heartanmind. 

       That's a change. - Amorella

       The Romantic, Mr. Orndorff, likes to consider himself like an embodiment of Caesar's Commentarii: "Gallia est omnis divisa in partes tres" [Commentaries: "Gaul is a whole divided into three parts"].  -mh

       

       1716 hours. Mrs. Maribelle Clary's Latin II class (1957-58) at Westerville High -- we had to translate and read the Latin version of Commentaries. It was so fascinating for me to read something direct from the hand (so to speak) of Julius Caesar in his own language. It was mesmerizing. Caesar was one of my first historical heroes along with the living ones, such as Churchill, FDR, and Eisenhower. I later read works by Churchill, FDR and Eisenhower.

       Caesar's words may not have moved into your soul, but the concept did. 'With words, one could, from the abstract, move into any writer's mind, so to speak'. mh

       1742 hours. Enough for now. This is so overwhelming within me. To remember the first time, to say aloud, "Gallia est omnis divisa in partes tres" . . . Awesome. It is like beginning again. 

       Post. - Amorella

       1945 hours. I had today's blog on Facebook for about an hour. No likes, no comments, so I took it off. Which was/is fine. Nothing new. I get excited with my writings sometimes and want to share; I do, then feel I shared enough so I take it off FB.

       I don't see a problem, orndorff. You do what moves you. With no likes and no comments, you thought it was up long enough anyway. Then when you checked you discovered six people had hit the page anyway. Relax. - Amorella

       Mostly you were embarrassed because there were no hits. Then, you were embarrassed because the first thing you thought of was that there were no hits. You know yourself better than this. You have little confidence in your writing self because few people are interested in reading or discussing what you think and write. This has been lifelong and thus nothing new. Deeper down, you don't really give a damn what people like or don't like anyway. You need to express yourself through writing so you do. That's really all there is to it, Mr. Orndorff. Let it go. mh

       2000 hours. You and Amorella can be so direct, but I appreciate it very much. Both of you have a sense of humor I can deal with. Humor levels me, I think it levels most everyone. People like smiles, wit and laughter even when they come from inner secret and sometimes conflicting thoughts. Humor can bring in a humbling wind and blow the conflicts away or at least subdue them for a while. 

       Post. - Amorella

       

140. Notes - this latter direction of conversation

140. 4 June 2019

       Later morning. You are facing east in the shade at Heritage Park. Carol is on her walk. In a bit you will be picking up the Avalon from Columbus Audio on Morse Road. There are three small bubbles they are fixing on the front-end protective shield. With the first fill-up the car only had 36.2 miles per gallon; used 10.4 gallons from a 13.2 gallon tank. Needless to say, you are more than a bit disappointed. So, you dropped the gear mode to 'economy' rather than 'normal' drive and await to see if it makes a difference. - Amorella

       1035 hours. The old Avalon was getting 37 m/g. I expected at least 40 m/g overall it is advertised new with 43.0; plus, the huge discrepancy from the 50 and 60 m/g registering on the car's computer on the shorter ranged trips to downtown Columbus and out to Delaware city on that first 471 miles. 

       You see Carol through the trees returning on the other side of the soccer/lacrosse practice field loop. - Amorella

       1045 hours. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful wife. I would be in a different, not so fortunate world without her near silent guidance, all these fifty plus years. 

       Late evening. You are fortunate. You survived your birth. - Amorella

       2226 hours.  That was blunt and to the point, but yes, after some thought, I agree. I am fortunate I survived. (2237)

       Amorella struck a chord that is unanswerable, and it appears to have been with intent. Mr. Orndorff cannot know he is fortunate because he survived. What was the alternative? And, how would that have been unfortunate for Mr. Orndorff alone? It is an unfair statement. What was the purpose of the statement? - mh

       The purpose was to draw you out, Miss Havisham. Orndorff needs to realize what you do, how you affect and effect his life in very discreet and indirect ways. - Amorella

       2248 hours. Is this true, Miss Havisham, and if it is true, is it also true of everyone's individual soul, that the soul discreetly and indirectly affects and effects everyone's life? 

       We souls protect and help to guide the heartanmind through the path the individual chooses to live. Free will wins out however. Sometimes protecting the heartanmind opens doors for unintended free will. Sometimes accidents happen through overprotection. Anyone who has been a parent can come to an understanding with this comment. - mh

       2301 hours. This is interesting and this latter direction of conversation was completely unthought by me. 

       Post. - Amorella

139. Notes - theatre / humility / imagination and spirit

139. 3 June 2019

       Mid-morning. Carol is with Gayle with a stop at Schneider's for doughnuts before heading to Otterbein Cemetery to stake pots with artificial flowers created by niece Jean at the headstones of Mary Lou and Mom and Dad Hammond in the north old Cook section not far from the old Schick and Freeman sections. - Amorella

       1004 hours. Your tone is reminding me of Thornton Wilder's Our Town, my favorite play of a lifetime of plays I have read and/or seen on stage or film. Strange how this is. Numbers two and three are Shakespeare's Hamlet and As You Like It; four is Sophocles'Antigone. In earlier stages of life, the top four plays were different titles and/or numerical orders. This is probably the list I'll go out

with.

       

       You're not a candle, boy. - Amorella

       1021 hours. It's just an expression, Amorella.

       Not to you. You see yourself as a candle with a very small flame, actually mostly a warm, glowing wick, don't you think? - Amorella

       That's about right, Amorella, a warm, glowing wick with little candle left. mh

       1026 hours. Most of that wick is nothing but pomp and circumstance; Sir Edward Edgar's "Pomp and Circumstance", Westerville High School's senior graduation marching song in 1960. Mostly theatre before; mostly theatre since.

       Post. - Amorella

       Early evening. Carol is out watering the new wildflowers in the back eight feet to the old fence. You had a nap but not good enough. As Steve G. uttered long, long ago, "Cheer up things are bound to get worse." The comment still makes you smile. Things did get worse, then eventually things got better to the point you have recognized for a long time now that thing are about as good as they are going to get at least on a personal greater family level. Do you agree? - Amorella

       1902 hours. I do, Amorella. I have, overall, had a very fortunate life. I took off the Facebook postings of the blog about three this morning. A few might want to read them but if they do they can go to the blog online and look the pages up for themselves. No need to advertise mental shortcomings or otherwise. One of my worst fears, always, was the books would become best sellers. I would be terrified by the ridiculous commercial publicity of it all. The same with the blogs. I like to check the stats (hits) just like I like to check the stats on the car mileage. It would not be good for me to have it any different. A few readers is enough. Shoot, one is enough; though having none would be a lesson in humility. Nothing wrong with that either. 

       Post. - Amorella

You have for your adult life secretly felt you are a stranger in a strange land. The science fiction aspects of the Merlyn books show evidence of this. It was as easy to pretend to be an alien marsupial humanoid from ThreePlanets as it was to be Merlyn and other characters from the post-Celtic Anglo-Saxon Isles both male or female. This is because you feel that the spirit only lives once and through imagination and empathy you wanted to experience as much of the world as you can while you are here. This really began when you talked to your grandparents about how life was for them growing up. You put yourself in their shoes as much as you could through imagination, recognizing early on that you were human and that they, being human, would have had similar childhood experiences but without cars and electricity. You experienced life on a farm without electricity at three, four, five and six which made such imaginary realism easier. You had ridden horses and been pulled by horse drawn wagons and sleighs on Auntie and Uncle Doc Haines' hundred-acre farm on Freeman Road north of Westerville, in Delaware County through the mid-forties on. You were born in 1942. The science fiction of Arthur C. Clarke and Isaac Asimov lead your imagination into probable futures, particularly Asimov when you were ten and eleven on. You feel you were born to write the Merlyn trilogy and you did in three years, one book a year self-published. mh

2051 hours. This is supposed to be about you, Miss Havisham, not about me. I know all these things and had written about them in pre-blog and blog days. Why are you reiterating them? 

Because these 'things' are in me, in your soul, as well as in your heartanmind. mh

But a lot of this was spurred by reading and imagination not reality, particularly the future aspects, lots of reading. 

Do you not think your imagination is a part of your human spirit? mh

2102 hours. I don't feel I ever thought about imagination in that way. I understand fully why once dead the spirit, if it continues, would desire to keep precious memories from having lived but what use would there be to have imagination once physically dead? I can understand how having an imagination is important in developing a metaphysical/spiritual aspect within, but once dead -- I assume as a whole spirit, you are then in the spiritual world. I like objectives and goals in my personal life, but I cannot imagine what objectives and goals I or anyone else would have in a spiritual life. Culture says we will be with our spiritual family groupings and Angels and G-D, not much else that I can remember. Heaven, Hell or Both or Neither. Spiritual stages perhaps. Reincarnation perhaps. I haven't heard much of anything else. (2120)

"Is there anything else?" is what you are thinking, orndorff, but you are suppressing the thought. - Amorella

2124 hours. I really don't want to know. It is not natural to know the objectives and goals or whatever of the human spiritual world. I can't imagine we just sit there and have good loving times or lie there under torture forever. All that would get boring either way. The human spirit does not like to be bored. If you know you are going to be loving and friendly or if you know you are going to be torn apart by monsters [every day or whatever timeless period] then what's the point? What is the bloodless spiritual point? Whatever it is we don't have and are not supposed to have the imagination for it. That's all I've got at the moment. (2134)

I agree wholeheartedly. mh

2137 hours. Total surprise with your response Miss Havisham.

Post. - Amorella

            2139 hours. Good. I'm tired anyway. We have to take the Avalon over to Columbus Audio to get a new protective shield for the front of the car as the other developed bubbles; at nine o'clock no less. 

138. Notes - be ye be or no / and you don't

138. 2 June 2019

       Early afternoon. This morning you decided, out of the blue, to share one blog a week. From now on then, on Sunday you will share a blog of your choice on your Facebook page for your 'Friends' not the world to see. - Amorella 

       1349 hours. I feel better with this kind of sharing -- once a week is enough. I had six likes last time I did. That sounds about right too. I'll pick one with humor and irony since Miss Havisham likes that too. 

       As this is about me (and souls in general) this is appropriate.Perspective is what I want you and the other readers to see. Perspective is enough. - mh

       1356 hours. Good. Perhaps it will cause me to hesitate before I begin the bully pulpit business, i.e. lecturing. 

       Define 'lecturing' orndorff. You lectured about one thing or another three to five times a week in your classes; sometimes for the whole hour for thirty-seven years. It's built in, only now you don't use any notes. You were notorious for using notes and at least inspecting what the students were taking down once in a while. - Amorella

** **

lecture - noun- an educational talk to an audience, especially to students in a university or college. • a long, serious speech, especially one given as a scolding or reprimand: the usual lecture on table manners. 

verb[no object] deliver an educational lecture or lectures: she was lecturing to her class of eighty students. • [with object] give a lecture to (a class or other audience): he was lecturing future generations of health-service professionals. • [with object] talk seriously or reprovingly to (someone): don't lecture me! 

ORIGIN late Middle English (in the sense ‘reading, a text to read’): from Old French, or from medieval Latin lectura, from Latin lect- ‘read, chosen’, from the verb legere.

Selected and edited from the Oxford/American software

** **

       Orndorff, underline the first use also even though you didn't teach at a college or university. - Amorella

       1410 hours. It doesn't seem proper because I didn't teach at a college or university. I would not have made a good college professor because I don't have the qualifications needed, never did, i.e. I am not a scholar. 

       You are a student. Remember your Chaucer. - Amorella

       1414 hours. Thank you. Amorella. I am humbly appreciative. I feel better not underlying the first definition. 

       Later. You are at the Proper Garden Nursery at the northwest corner Rt. 315 and Hyatts Road. Carol is looking for plants for your eight feet-to-the-fence of 'natural outback'. - Amorella

       A move (with two plants in the back seat) up to Shale Hollow park. You are facing south at the trees and fifteen-foot naked shale cliff about fifteen yards ahead of you. Carol is on page 149 (Chapter 18) of Coben's Darkest Fear. - Amorella

       1522 hours. I can smell the fresh oxygen from trees and vegetation. A pleasant Sunday afternoon. What, ho! A baby chipmunk, about the size my fore and middle fingers plus a tail. Cute little guy. He was about twelve feet to the southwest beside a tree trunk before disappearing from view. 

       What does this scene remind you of, orndorff? - Amorella

       

       1529 hours. It reminds me of Merlyn in his private camp area in Avalon, or a facsimile of Avalon in my imagination. This was about five or six hundred Anno Domini in the story. He has a pet with him, an owl or hawk I think. He has a small cabin, conjured up from the concept of Thoreau’s cabin (size-wise) at Waldon's Pond, but Medieval-like in structure. There is a river nearby and the setting is out of his time alive in a small forest of trees in Scotland. The river is about ten feet from the cabin and he has a small boat, I forget the name, that the Celts of the area used. To the north there is a mountain (in his soul - this is all in his soul) and somewhere on or beyond the mountain is his secret way back to Earth, returning as a spirit to Amorella so she can translate the scene. After all, he is Merlyn and he knows things mortals such as I do not know. (1544)

       In a moment you were there once again in your head. - mh

       1546 hours. Whoa. Once again, you are like a faery of old, Amorella, placing me into a momentary enchantment. 

       This is how it still is in your head and spirit, Mr. Orndorff. Those books your fingers wrote (not grammar error and factual free) are in here for your personal and soul bound comfort. The writing was real enough to drop in here. Perhaps not word for word, but the sense of it is similar to your paragraph at 1529 hours. - mh

       1554 hours. Oh, were this so it would be as Heaven to me. I miss Merlyn and his pet, whatever it was. Avalon was a neat and mystical place where I couldn't go but Merlyn could. And, as such, at this moment, you are as an Angel, Amorella, be ye be or no. 

       Post. - Amorella

       Carol is out working on her flowers after you both watched the national news while eating a light supper. - Amorella

       You dropped into a slump because you had your highlight of the day, the paragraph at 1529. Once that paragraph was written your momentary 'enchantment', as it were, immediately disappeared. - mh

       2009 hours. It is remarkable that I could draw up that scene so close to the intensity of the original writing. I was perhaps hypnotically self-reintroduced into that general scene. The shock is that the scene is still in my head in the first place. I haven't thought about that scene for years, maybe a decade. Where is that memory set itself, for this length of time? Surely, it is in the brain. Spiritual memory has to have a basis, a bio-chemical place. I don't have a good memory. Anyone who knows me knows this. Memories don't readily reconnect and it is difficult to believe any memory is completely factual unless it is indeed an accepted fact, and, even then, if it is based solely on human observations, it might still be questioned, and rightly so -- that's what courts and judges and juries are for. (2029) [I can't believe I have been writing this for ten minutes.]

       Your time spent writing is the key. Ten minutes is way too long in your mind for writing such a short thought that you can read in a few seconds. You envision yourself as not-in-a-flowing-consciousness-while-the-fingers-are-on-and-off-the-keyboard-until-the-work-is-completed; until the thought is completed in word and sentence form the thought is not real. The confusion comes with the thought being real, but the thought may still be real imagination in content, not reality real. mh

       That indeed may be the case. I become confused over the thought being real when it is only real imagination, not real, and I use this confusion to add a believable reality to the fiction. I allow myself to accept this error to attempt to make my story more realistic to the reader, and also to myself. It is no wonder I am confused with it sometimes, but only in writing. I can accept this. I am not a madman. I can understand and accept what being human is, but I don't have to like the conditionals as they are.

       And, you don't. Post. - Amorella

137. Notes - You are funny, Mr. Orndorff / No apology

137. 31 May 2019

       Mid-morning. You are having a problem articulating your frustration with Miss Havisham. Why? Because you remember what you once wanted chipped into your headstone: "Mostly Fiction" which is the darkest of your humor laced with irony. It seems, to you, that Miss Havisham is practicing what you once preached about yourself: "Remember, I am mostly fiction." Why? Because from the time you can remember you have made up stories or embellished stories because it made the story more entertaining. Why? Because you were bored. At four and five you believed in faeries and ghosts. You continued to believe in both until way in the forties. Why? Because it was not impossible even though it was way passed probable. You once thought I could possibly be an Angel of G-D even though you are an agnostic. Why? Because you 'felt' personal evidence of it. Being an agnostic though and knowing that human beings are full of self-deception; there is always the probability of self-trickery at work. Everything (human) is not always what it seems. You remember that Miss Havisham feels, as it were, that an Angel is possible, that she feels something to that effect, but that you, your human spirit, your heartansoulanmind together does not fully appreciate the one-third which appears, to you, to be too eager to please. Yesterday's words in blue seem to have been baiting you, and you are not going to have any of that if you can help it. Do these words explain your frustration? - Amorella

       0932 hours. Yes, they do. Thank you, Amorella. It is an editorial of sorts, a rebuttal to what Miss Havisham said yesterday. The best part, to me, was her wit with the "long and the short of the dash" (technically a hyphen) between the capital G and D. Shakespeare's Hamlet says, "Since brevity is the soul of wit / And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes, I will be brief . . ." I twist that around and say, my soul is the brevity of wit with the 'dash' explanation. That is my heartansoulanmind at work not just my soul, Miss Havisham. (0941)

       You are funny, Mr. Orndorff. - mh

       Post. - Amorella

       You are up at Oakland Nursery on Rt. 36 on the far east side of Delaware proper. Carol is shopping for plants. You got fifty miles per gallon taking Kim and Paul over to Muirfield to watch the golf tournament. - Amorella

** **

Muirfield Village

Muirfield Village is an upscale golf-oriented community in the central United States, located in Dublin, Ohio, a suburb north of Columbus.

Founded by Jack Nicklaus, it is named after Muirfield, Scotland,^[4] where he won the first of his three British Open titles in 1966 to complete the first of his three career grand slams. The village contains an eponymous golf course that hosts the Memorial Tournament, a PGA Tour event played each spring since its inception 43 years ago in 1976. A bronze sculpture of Nicklaus mentoring a young golfer, unveiled in 1999, is located in the wide median of Muirfield Drive.^[5][6]

Selected and edited from Wikipedia

** **

       You are embarrassed that the miles per gallon popped from your fingertips because it is irrelevant to the objective at hand, but it is not, because Miss Havisham was affected by your initial passion for the car mileage. "Awesome!" you said to yourself, "I'll have to tell Paul," and you did only because your finger hit the car phone accidently and his number rang once. You shut it off immediately, but he called you right back. After apologizing, you spirted the news out as you hung up. - mh

       1354 hours. These little things are not important, Miss Havisham.

       You are wrong in that assumption, Mr. Orndorff. Most everyone will tell you that some of the most seemingly trivial observations in their personal world will drop into their souls and stay forever. -mh

       1639 hours. What people say and what happens can easily be two different things. This last paragraph of yours reads like an exaggeration, Miss Havisham. Things happen. For example, someone speeds through a yellow to red light, but then at before the next light someone in a large tow truck pulls out from a side street distracted by a bee in the car. The car hits the truck and the driver of the car dies. The light signal appeared trivial but by speeding through it he was in an unavoidable accident with a tow truck and died. If the bee hadn't distracted the truck driver all would have been well. Coincidence, but it could have been avoided if both drivers drove in safer modes of operation, but as is, one dies and the other lives knowing he should have paid more attention. As the event staying in their souls forever, who knows. Being immortal or not, what does a soul know of forever; a human being knows even less. People are full of bullshit, and I'm no different than anyone else . . .. It's easy to put words into sentences but whatever the words don't make what appears factual actually so. Details are most always missing. Lots of so-called facts are filled in with assumptions no one wants to deal with. What do some people say, "Leave it up to G-D to decide what happened" or "It was G-D will." I don't feel there is anything wrong with people saying, "It's G-D will." What do I know? The point is that it can be thought through deeper which in my mind is more humbling and thus more personally sacred. (1732)

       Why don't you just shut up for a while, orndorff and post. (Don't you dare apologize.) - Amorella

       1735 hours. You know how to put it to me, Amorella. You are just amazing. 

136. Notes - the dash

136. 30 May 2019

       Mid-morning. When you awoke about three hours ago your thoughts were on yesterday's family gathering at Old Bag of Nails.  Most remembered the place as Ben Franklin's Five and Dime, but Aunt Ruthie again reminded everyone that the building was an A&P when she worked there as a clerk. - Amorella

** **

The Great Atlantic & Pacific Tea Company, better known as A&P, was an American chain of grocery stores that ceased supermarket operations in November 2015, after 156 years in business. From 1915 through 1975, A&P was the largest grocery retailer in the United States (and until 1965, the largest U.S. retailer of any kind) A&P was considered an American icon that, according to The Wall Street Journal, "was as well-known as McDonald's or Google is today", and was "the Walmart before Walmart". At its peak in the 1940s, A&P captured 10% of total US grocery spend Known for innovation, A&P and the supermarkets that followed its lead significantly improved nutritional habits by making available a vast assortment of food products at much lower costs. Until 1982, A&P also was a large food manufacturer. In his 1952 book, American Capitalism, John Kenneth Galbraith cited A&P's manufacturing strategy as a classic example of countervailing power that was a welcome alternative to state price controls.

Selected and edited from Wikipedia

** **

       You brought up how your mother said you were a lot like her Grandpa [Charles Fletcher] Freeman and she laughed and said "Grandpa Charlie was lazy, but everyone liked him. He would sit in a rocker on the front porch at the large white house on the north side of East College before the railroad tracks. People would walk by and say, "Hi, Charlie!" and he would respond, "How ye be?" - Amorella

       1417 hours. My other great, grandfather, Michael Bookman was well liked too. From what I heard from Grandma Orndorff he was known for being a kind-hearted banker. And, sometimes if the bank wouldn't give someone alone, he gave one personally. 

       The key is, both were kind-hearted souls - mh

       Kim, Paul and the boys stopped by and invited you both to casual supper tonight. You are going. Tomorrow you may be taking Kim and Paul over to the big Masters golf tournament in Dublin. They both have a good time spending part of the day at the course and surrounding festivities. Then, Saturday evening they have a wedding downtown, Carol is watching the boys while you again play 'Uber' driver at take them downtown for the wedding and pick them up later. While here, Paul fixed the TV so you could again pick up Prime and Netflix, both have been out for about a week. Paul said you would have to buy a new TV to pick up the extra programming from PBS. - Amorella

       1557 hours. Carol is taking a nap. Paul spent time fun working on Apple Play for the car. Looks cool, once it's hooked up. Now we have it on temporary. 

       Yesterday, when I said I was first, I meant souls were created before beings had spiritual hearts and minds. - mh 

       1614 hours. I assume souls, being immortal, always exist. I need a definition.

** **

immortal - adjective - living forever; never dying or decaying: our mortal bodies are inhabited by immortal souls. 

Selected and edited from the Oxford/American software

** **

       Souls are not alive and never have been. Souls are disembodied Consciousness in spirit form. This 'Consciousness' is a Gravity, that provides order throughout the spirit world; it also infiltrates the material world between the gravity waves, as between the lines on a page. This 'Consciousness' is not human-like consciousness, it is a Less that is More because it is less than the Nothing that holds the material world in its underliing e-x-i-s-t-e-n-c-e. This is an understanding, not a fact. -mh

       1643 hours. Existence is the larger picture. 

       Yes, existence is without a foundation that exists only because existence exists. mh

       1647 hours. Without material existence spiritual existence would not exist.

       That's the long and the short of it. Without material existence there would be no need for spiritual existence. Disembodied Consciousness would continue to be, but without any other reference. mh

       Without spiritual existence in living material there would be no need for souls. The spiritual existence, the Disembodied Consciousness would not be Necessary. mh

       1655 hours. What does this say about the human sense of what G-D is. 

       The dash. The long and the short of it from a living human's perspective, i.e. human beings in any form, with or without souls, are always too big to see what cannot be phantomed. 

       Post. - Amorella

135. Notes - nourishment to the soul / I learned something

135. 29 May 2019

       Morning. In a half hour or so you are meeting Cathy and Tod at Old Bag of Nails in Uptown Westerville to hold a table for Aunt Ruthie and Tony, Gretchen and Jerry and Wendy and Jim for a pre-summer reunion of family oldsters. - Amorella

       This is very exciting for you because it pleases Aunt Ruthie that you are doing this. Everyone loves Aunt Ruthie and she is one of the last contacts with everyone else in the family who is gone. She's the meat of the meal. - mh

       1053 hours. What an odd expression. 

       A family gathering such as this is nourishment to the soul. - mh

       

       Post. - Amorella

       Nearing bedtime. Everyone had a delightful time and this afternoon you suggested meeting again this Summer. Some positive feedback so you will meet with Aunt Ruthie, Tony and Cathy and Tod. Cathy wrote back with 'lots of stories and laughter [today]". You agree completely. Most everyone told an old story or two about growing up in Westerville. You told Aunt Ruthie that Mom more than once said that you reminded her a lot of her Grandpa Freeman (your great-grandfather). Aunt Ruthie started laughing at the thought, and you wondered if your mother was saying something derogatory about you (in your teens). She said her Grandpa Freeman was very well liked by everyone in the community but that he was basically a lazy man. Everyone laughed. - Amorella

       2220 hours. That's an example of how the stories were from most everybody. Funny things that happened growing up in the Westerville area when the population was about 500 or so in town in summer and when Otterbein was in session there were an added 1000. That's how Aunt Ruthie remembers being told that about those who lived there about 1915. She was born in '29. I had heard Westerville was a small peaceful village where everyone knew everyone else's business or hoped to if they didn't. I think that was from Aunt Patsy some years ago but I wouldn't swear to it. 

       Deep down, what delights you the most in family sessions like this is the intent of showing each other observations of personal humanity in its raw state with everyone accepting everyone else for what they honestly are. - mh

       2233 hours. I like you, Miss Havisham. In some ways you tell things like they are, just like Amorella. 

       Dear Mr. Orndorff, I am in no way like Amorella, though to you it appears that I am because we are both of the spirit world so to speak, and we both 'appear' from your head, that is literally, from your fingertips tapping the computer keys. - mh

       2239 hours. I am really not that eager to hear more from you on this subject, Miss Havisham. I accept that you two are as a different kind of spirit. Obviously, if you are indeed a personification of my soul, then you are a part of me. 

       That is not the way it works. I am first. You are a part of me not the other way around. I accept you. mh

       2245 hours. That turns my table. 

       Post. - Amorella

       2246 hours. Gladly, Amorella. On face value, I learned something tonight, if indeed Miss Havisham is my soul or rather if I am Miss Havisham's spirit human.